```EMOTIONAL LETTER TO YOU...``` _TO THE MARRIED..._

#donsucces

Congratulations, I cherish your togetherness. Meanwhile,
remember, love is not about "it's your fault", but all about "I'm
sorry". Love is not about "where are you", but all about "I'm right
here". Love is not about "how could you",
but all about "I
understand". Love is not about "I wish you were", but all about
"I'm thankful you are."
_TO THE ENGAGED..._
Congatulations too as you have resolved together to go into this
perpetual emotional journey. But remember, the true measure of
compatibility is not the years spent together, but how good you
are for each other. Try as much as possible to work it out, it's
one of the best feeling in life. It's worth it.
_TO THE NOT-SO-SINGLE..._
Doing emotional "interview" by having numerous partners in
order to pick the most "qualified candidate" does not work most
times. Stick with someone your heart and soul yearn for, not the
one your eyes search for. Love is not about becoming someone
else's "perfect person.", it is about finding someone who helps
you become the best person you can be.
_TO THE "I'M-IN-LOVE"..._
I will say kudos to you too. But remember love sometimes is not
all about happiness, but sacrificing your happiness for someone
else's weaknesses. Also have it in mind that it won't be smooth
sailing just like the day you both agreed to go into a relationship,
so be prepared to make symbiotic sacrifices for that altimate
goal - marriage. Also be warned to reduce online
"advertisement" of your "boo", most times it's detrimental, if
things didn't go as planned and as thought, you will be the
hardest hit and you might even be converted to a "case study".
Activating "in a relationship", "engaged" and "being toasted"
button on Facebook might generate little comments and "likes",
but will affect you more if you change the button in the future
again to "Single". Learn to keep important things in your life
secret until they are obvious to others, wait till after marriage,
then you can convert your facebook page to a photo album, but
until then, wait!
_TO THE SINGLES...._
Love is like a butterfly; the more you chase it, the more it eludes
you. But if you just patiently wait, it will come to you when you
least expected it. Love will give you the best in life and glow
your spirit only when you give it to someone who is really worth
it and can reciprocate it. So take your time and choose wisely.
_TO THOSE SEARCHING..._
To my "course-mates" well done. I know you are searching for
your soul mate, if I get you right, that means someone who
thinks, behaves, dresses, eats, drinks, sleeps, dances, walks,
reads, feels and likes all the same things as you right? Well, it
might work in a Nollywood or a Hollywood movie, but in reality
it's not possible. And besides, its not a healthy type of
relationship, you know why? It will grow out of unresolved
insecurities. When your partner's thoughts, feelings and
behaviours mirror your own, you're validated by the illusion of
sameness and it's a way of avoiding uncertainty within the
relationship. Eventually, when there is a difference of opinion,
you feel threatened and invalidated. Before you know it, you will
begin to doubt the relationship, and may even think your partner
is a fake. Aunty/Brother, don't kill off your relationship by
expecting your partner to think, feel and behave the same way
you do, instead, celebrate the differences and make yourself
open to diversity. When you do that, your relationship can
become an exciting journey of growth and self-discovery.
_TO THE HEARTBROKEN..._
Hmmmmmn. According to my friend, nothing last forever, not
even aboki's perfume.
Heartbreaks last as long as you want it, and cut as deep as you
allow them to go. The challenge is not how to survive
heartbreaks, but how to learn from them. Though most times,
it's difficult to let go, but what will be will be; if you are meant to
be together he/she will surely come back, but if not, there's
nothing you can do. Move on.
_TO THE NAIVE..._
Yes. You keep reading love stories, watching love movies and
listening to love songs. But know one thing, most of the authors
of love books are either divorced, or having issues with their
unions, most of the singers of love songs are not even in
relationships, and most of the actors and actresses in love
movies don't even believe in love because they have either not
experienced it or have been "dealt with" in the past. Therefore
don't believe all you read, listen to or watch. Take my simple
advice; fall in love but don't stumble, be consistent but not too
persistent, share and never be unfair, understand and try not to
be too demanding, get hurt, but never keep the pain.
_TO THE POSSESSIVE..._
It breaks your heart to see the one you love happy with someone
else, but it's more painful to know that the one you love is
unhappy with you. Don't be too attached. Don't give your
happiness to your lover, give yourself much joy, your happiness
should not be dependent on your partner. The phrases and
statements like "She is the joy of my life", "He is the reason why
I'm breathing", "Without her I'm worthless", "He is my world" etc
are not practical. Nobody can give you a better joy than the one
you create for yourself. Nobody is your world, you are your own
world. Yes, love increases your happiness, but the key to your
happiness and joy is in your hands. Don't hold love too tight, it
might get choked.
_TO THOSE AFRAID TO PROFESS AND CONFESS LOVE..._
Love hurts when you break up with someone. It hurts even more
when someone breaks up with you. But love hurts the most
when the person you love has no idea how you feel. Tell him/
her how you feel, he/she might just be waiting for you to talk.
Nothing stops a woman from approaching the man she loves.
The world has gone beyond "rural" emotion. If you love me, tell
me.
_TO THE CHEATS..._
Behind every untrusting girl is a boy who lied, cheated and broke
his promises to her. Behind every untrusting guy is a girl who
toiled with his heart. I'm not encouraging infidelity, but don't let
us be too quick to judge; if witches were given time to explain
why they did what they did, some of them might be right (a
proverb in Okene). But one thing the cheats need to know too is
that, they are not doing anyone any harm but themselves.
_TO THOSE CHANGING PARTNERS..._
Sometimes within you, you feel justified by changing partners
like clothes just because of few amendable "sins" that you too
cannot even exonerate yourself from, I plead with you to have
second thought. You may think you are still young and beautiful,
but think about it, if you keep changing courses in a higher
institution; sometimes after a year studying a course, sometimes
you have spent like 4 semesters, sometimes you are almost
through before you "realise" that the course is "boring", tell me,
when will you graduate? When will you even master the
discipline? Relationships are not meant to be projects, if you are
spending all your time repairing, fixing, upgrading and changing,
please have a second thought. Besides, you are not getting
younger, every minutes of your life counts.
_TO THOSE AFRAID TO INVEST IN LOVE..._
Just like business, love itself needs investment before it can
grow. All the hype about "She no want Designer", "She no want
Ferrarri" stuff are pure slogans. The female species that doesn't
want money and good things of life left the surface of the earth
around 1340BC, so if any man is looking for females that doesn't
want anything but love will need to consult archeologists. Both
males and females are gold diggers, the different is that some
of us are heavy diggers, some of us are lazy diggers, some of us
are occasional diggers while some of us are simple diggers, but
we all dig! Love without "financial empowerment" no matter how
little will shrink with time. So please invest in your partner and
you will reap the reward of your investment. Love alone is not
enough, add money to it and see a better result.
_TO ALL MY FRIENDS..._
My wish for you is a man/woman whose love is honest, strong,
mature, never-ending, never-changing, ever-upgrading, uplifting